That Blossom Tree
by Fawntuft
Summary: Little On-shot about two of my characters (dustfur and Amberpool), were one discovers that he is half Thunderclan half Windclan and needs to leave his loved one.


_"Several Times I look at that blossom tree, the one that made everything possible, the one that started a love, the one that broke a heart. Several times I look at that blossom tree, the one that changed my life forever."_

I felt the strong will of my paws burning through my flesh, down to my claws. It was a strange and exciting sensation, the tension that grew in my toes was a cold flame, like fresh waves were washing down my claws. There were no words to describe the way I was feeling. Inspiration, Will, Fear, Faith? Those were my picks in the description of my emotions.

My claws raked the soft earth, sending dust and mud flying to the air. The ground was cold dead, the air was dense and pressured by the trees. My paws led me through the forest. Dodging trees, jumping above branches and avoiding bramble bushes. Now and then I would see a glimpse of sunshine, like a strike of lightning, through the closed leafs of the trees of the forest.

Suddenly it hit me. The soft breeze of the lake filled my nostrils with such smell. The scent was sweet and delicate like a mother's mew but, at the same time, full of energy and excitement, like when you know you are entering your first battle. I knew I was getting close to my destination and, perhaps, my destiny.

I kept running, feeling the once cold and unwelcoming earth of the forest, turning to a heated, sunlight pathed land. Then my thoughts turned to the time. I felt my head tuning up, my eyes following. Dawn, I thought. I was late.

Then I remembered what I was about to do. My heart, once full of excitement and warmth, turned cold and bristle. I was going to kill the only happiness in my life, the only light that I had and knew, who led me through darkness and the most obscure parts of my life, my only sun when the skies are blue. I was going to end my first love, and all the life I knew and ever lived with it.

They say I am too young to make such decisions like that. But I know, someday, my life will pass me by in a blink of an eye. I know I am doing the right thing, I need to be doing the right thing. This must be the right choice. The right path.

Lost in thoughts, I was lucky not to forget my path and fall on the dull lake, that was now by my side, watching every step I took around it. The water was still and calm, catching up with the first lights of the day that shone on the blue water.

I began to run, at each strong pull, my firm and heavy legs touched the soft ground, sending me fast through the lake´s borderline. It was like I was running against the ripples, that got just more excited at every push.

Daring my limits, I pushed and pulled farther up ahead, I felt like a Windclan warrior already, running with the nimble breeze. I took a gulp of air and felt my nostrils feel with, suddenly, a foggy kind of mist, that was now disappearing with every flash of sunlight.

I felt the firm steady strike of sunlight on my fur as I ran past the trees, reaching finally, my stop. It was like I found myself in a diferent land. I was out of the cold forest, and was now and the warm patches of sunlight, in a never ending meadow. I began slowing up, making the delicate earth messed up. I came to a stop then, nervous, I looked up.

There she was. Her fur was like it was made from heaven. Her tail, brushed with Starclan´s paws. Her gaze was on the water, while her body stood still. Her claws, firm in the trunk of the tree. She was like an angel, who I was ready to cut the wings off. Her gracefulness, combined with the blossoms on the tree branches, was majestic.

I wanted to turn back, I wanted to pretend I didn´t know about it, that I didn´t know the truth. But I did, and it was my responsibility to accept it. I pushed the thought away.

I got myself pushing my lips together, making a bird´s sound. It echoed like a robin´s whisper in a summer tree. My dark blue eyes were still on the beatiful shape, up on the tree. Then I felt her ears pinning up, her body turned to me, but her head was still.

Suddenly her soft aqua eyes moved towards me. And with every second, her expression began to change. From a curious quick glance to a big happy smile. She said nothing but I knew she was waiting for me. Guarding my spot on the tree like she guarded her life, waiting endlessly while the sun rised. Each new ray was a new hope for her.

Still smiling the shape up on the tree turned her head to the lake once again, her tail was now pointing to my part of the trunk. As nimble and quick as ever, I climbed the tree. I never understood how she could do it so fast.

I finally got up and seated on my desired place. We were, for a few moments, in a calm and comfortable silence. I began seeing flashbacks of my life. How I was scared of pretty she-cats, of taking a rise, of starting conversations. How I was afraid of the dark, that I would never find love again.

But that didn´t matter, my biggest fear on that second was her reaction. I just wanted to know if she was going to stay. I am not sure if I can have it any other way…. Those were my demons, hidden deap in my soul. But my cards were already thrown, I didn´t have any others on the way.

I hoped she would stay with me. But my mind knew this wasn´t the answer. Why won´t she stay with me? I fought with myself. It wouldn´t be possible. If I was going to do this, I couldn´t take her with me. I remembered the day I told her that, as long as I am with her, there was no place I rather be. But I was going agaisnt my vowel. It was suffocating, I felt like I was drowning, but I was breathing fine.

Then, without warning, I felt her eyes burning through me. She knew, she knew I was about to say something, she knew about the battles happening in my soul. I turned my head to her, and I knew my expression was miserable. But her gaze was soft and assuring, like it said "Go ahead, I can take it".

I knew she couldn´t but I went ahead anyway, I broke the silence with a rather forced and nervous whisper, telling her about my origins. How I found out my life was a lie. How I wanted to go further with my brother. How I wanted to find the truth, how I discovered I could be more, how I knew I wasn´t what I thought I was. I told her about the journey I wanted to do, I how I would be out for days. I got carried away with the feeling of adventure and the future. For some moments I forgot I was on a tree, watching the sun rise, feeling the soft breeze of the lake in my fur, watching the ripples, talking about my destiny and future, standing there...with her.

I could feel her excitment, she was proud of me and happy for me. My words poisoned her, filling her body and mind with positive and freedom emotions. But nothing lasts forever. After a stop, I came back to reality. The I told her I couldn´t take her with me, that our story together had to end here, that we wouldn´t be able to see each other any longer, that this blossom tree was the only thing that would last of our love, the only meaning it ever existed.

I knew I was being too cold, unsensible and harsh, but it was rather to her good. If she thought I didn´t cared about her, maybe it would hurt less, maybe thinking she was better without me made my heart burn less. My mind knew I was doing what was right but my pumping heart demanded me to tell her that I loved her and that we would find a way. But I couldn´t, I wouldn´t.

I didn´t dare to look at her. I knew she was thinking... "What about our love? What about our happy moments together? Are you just going to throw that away?". I finally had the courage to look at the shape who sat now farther from me. Her rather brillant aqua eyes were now cold and without color. She was staring deep at the lake, her expression was calm and collected. Like she was trying to process the information.

I couldn´t bare to look at her any longer, knowing that I was the one to blame. I knew I had done the deed and I couldn´t turn back time. I quietly jumped to the ground after dodging some branches. I didn´t even turn back to look if she was glancing at me, it didn´t matter anymore. Tears were forming on my eyes as I retraced the same path I walked earlier. Now the strong and wild breeze that gave me so much happiness was just a reminder of what I had done. I was selfish, I only thought about myself, I should stay far from everyone. Especially from her. There is nothing left to say now.


End file.
